Macster Musings: Reunions, Holiday Shopping, and the End of the World

Thanksgiving has come and gone which of course means the countdown to Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, etc already began on Black Friday. Given the economy, I really don't know what the big deal was about Black Friday this year. I pity the fools that actually waited in sales lines. Any business that isn't continuing on with a Black December is most likely in for a rude awakening. Fortunately for us consumers, I think most businesses DO realize what a tank of shit we're all in and are extending their sales. Recessions aren't fun. Well, let me clarify. They aren't fun if you have a mortgage, a family, and/or other fiscal responsibilities that can't be cured by a bi-monthly unemployment check. If you're like me, a twenty-something with disposable income and no financial obligations beyond rent, bills, and debauchery, then a recession can be somewhat fun! Last year I bought a Samsung (best brand) 50 inch plasma TV for $900. Every time I watch a glorious NFL game in HD I thank the recession for allowing me the means to acquire this critical upgrade in my personal entertainment echelon at a price I could afford without cutting corners! A 50 inch Samsung Plasma back in the time of When Things Were Normal would have been impossible to purchase. I would have had to put that shit on lay away. In fact, I wouldn't have even bought one. I'd still be watching games on my pinner 30 inch non-HDTV that I've hence handed down to my parents. And before you judge me, my parents have no concept of technology and my kind hand-me-up was literally an upgrade over their old "big screen TV" that they bought back in 1990 when Good Guys was still the king of electronics. I'm a great son.

But speaking of technology, I have to comment how our advances in this particular field are going to be the end of civilization. WARNING: My thoughts on this are not original. I've heard many people comment on this. However, I can't help but throw in my two cents as well. Why? Because this is Macster Uncensored and I can post whatever I damn well want. Moving on. Electronics. There I was at Phyllis's Giant Burgers in Marin County, waiting on the best burger in the country, minding my own and watching the SEC Championship game between Florida and Alabama. Then I saw something disturbing. A father and son, also waiting for their delectable dishes, happened to be sitting next to me. The son, probably about 8 years old, was fully engaged in the game. And there was his father, oblivious, texting away or perusing the internet on his iPhone. It wasn't that the father was completely neglecting his son or the most important football game of the year that got to me. I mean, maybe pops didn't like college football. And I don't have kids. Not yet. Not for awhile. But I suspect that some days, as a dad, you want your own time. You want to go to your world. You don't want to deal with your kid or his endless observations, chatter, and antics. Sitting at a burger joint seemingly provides enough distraction for your child that you can get a few fleeting moments to yourself. So I get why he wasn't actively engaged with his son or the game (or anything besides his iPhone for that matter). But when Tebow threw a nice pass for a TD, his son tried to get his attention without being intrusive. "Dad, look at this pass by Florida. Look at the touchdown! Wow, what a catch!" And without even looking at the television, without even looking at his son, still glued to his iPhone, a curt "Yes son, great." I don't judge too often. Only about 15 times per day. But seriously? You don't even look? Like I said, I get it if it's one of those things that kids normally do. You know the routine:

"Hey look at me, look at this, watch me do this, look at that!" Meanwhile, they're doing something ridiculously obnoxious. It's also where parents often just give a half-assed and often non-genuine "very cool" or "that's great."

That I understand and accept. But watching this father completely ignore his son's enthusiastic attempt to get him to witness an awesome college football play really bugged me. Because let's face it, all men like college football. The guy was wearing a Cal sweatshirt for God's sake. And if that were my son, who was pointing out a well executed football play, I'd be beaming with pride. My son understands football! Awesome! I'd embrace the moment with him. "Heck yes son, that WAS a nice pass! If we keep practicing and working hard, one day that can be you. And you can go to the NFL and make the old man millions!" But no, this guy was too busy with whatever was on his iPhone. His iPhone was more important to him at that moment than his son. And the outcome of a college football game that determined who was #1 in the nation. Both inexcusable. And this got me reflecting on technology. On one hand, where would I be without technology? Writing memoirs on a typewriter for one. Definitely not blogging. I work at an internet start-up so I'd most definitely not be in the profession I'm in. And that 50 inch Samsung? Wouldn't be able to watch crisp high definition programming without it. But that being said, technology is a major evil. I used to use disposable Kodak cameras to take pictures. I had 27 chances to capture the pictures I wanted. Otherwise, tough shit. Now I have a digital camera. I take 27 pictures in half an hour and that doesn't even include the ones I deem not good enough and discard upon instant review. The greatest irony about the internet is that it helps us connect with people more than ever before. We can track down pretty much anyone these days if they want to be found. And former friendships can be rekindled with a few broad keystrokes. On the other hand, technology is killing social etiquette and social skills. Before Match and eHarmony and Myspace and Facebook people actually had to go into dates not knowing really anything about the other person. And prior to that, they actually had to MEET the person without sending some sort of message electronically. We live in an age where we're encouraged to be anti-social. Don't believe me? How often do you legitimately see someone walking down the street NOT listening to their iPod or pecking away at their smart phone or laptop? When was the last time you were on a bus or a flight where the person next to you was ready to engage in conversation because you guys had no reason not to? We are making it easier and easier to escape from random in-person encounters by creating easier and easier ways to brush them off by interacting with our current world electronically. It is a fact that American kids are more obese today because they have less inclination to go outside. Why go outside and play tag or hide and go seek when you can play Call of Duty on Xbox with your buddy who's remotely connected from his house? Why play team sports when you can play tennis by yourself on the Wii? Why go the gym when you can use Wii Fitness? Why go to the movies when you can download them illegally and watch them on your flatscreen? Why go to the bookstore when you can download material to your Kindle. Why go shopping when you can buy online for cheaper? Technology will be the end of civilization. Not because computers will gain self-consciousness and destroy us like in The Terminator. Not because computers will create World War III like in WarGames. No! Technology is going to end civilization as we know it because we're all going to become anti-social robots who forget the most basic social skills like saying hi to a stranger on the bus, smiling at the cute girl walking down the street, or helping granny cross the street. However, we'll be able to survive. Because some YouTube video will demonstrate how to get by in a world where no one interacts. And it'll probably be hosted by someone equally vapid yet trusted. Someone like Nicole Kidman.

And finally, I have to touch upon my 10 year high school reunion. How can I not? When I originally graduated, the thought of my 10 year reunion seemed so foreign and far away. I pretty much thought by the time I reunited with my high school chums, I'd be well on my way to being an ESPN anchor (or rock star), settled in life and love, and probably even more amazing than I was then. It was science. Me + 10 years = Coolest Person Ever. Ok, maybe that was more like faulty math. However, fast forward 10 years, and that's clearly not the case. My life is nothing near where or what I thought it'd be. I have no supermodel on my arm, I'm not working in Bristol, and although I am Macster and I've made many memories for my Macster mates, I still haven't done anything earth shattering. Yet. I did NOT invent the post-it note and I have no claiming feat aside from this blog and a whole bevvy of Macster Madness mayhem stories that live on like legend. So as I pulled up to my reunion, I had no idea what to expect. Well, that's not true at all. I knew exactly what to expect. In terms of what people looked like and what they were doing. Because now that Facebook exists, is there any mystery at reunions? Of course not!! If there was anyone I cared about in high school or that I was curious about seeing, I simply already had facestalked them. I knew what they presently looked like and I knew whether they were married, engaged, in a relationship, single, or single by default (i.e. deleting your relationship status, hence admitting you are ashamedly single). And doesn't that sort of dilute the fun? Well, yes and no. Although I knew some things, the reunion itself was a fun get together. You put together 150-200 people from your high school class into a small lounge with an open bar and all sorts of fun ensues. And surprisingly, I didn't have many of those "what do you do now?" conversations. Actually, what am I talking about, of course I didn't have those convos, it wasn't surprising at all. Clearly, they had all facestalked me just as I had them. So the mystery was gone. Everyone had a basic idea as to what people were up to. Unless those people ignored, boycotted, or simply didn't use Facebook. You could tell which ones because they actually DID ask you what you were doing now. But in the end, it was like old times. The cliques in high school could be spotted here and there but they tended to melt away fairly quickly and there was great and random reorganizations. But let's face it. The whole allure of reunions is seeing who's doing what, who's dating who, and how everyone's changed. All which of course can be found on Facebook. I'm telling you, technology is killing us slowly. But I can't complain. I mean, where else could I rant about technology than on a blog? Where else would I get an audience? On a platform on the street? Yeah right! No one would hear my message! You all would be too busy checking your email on your Crackberry and bumping Jay-Z on your iPod, ignoring a complete stranger like me. Unless, of course, you had met me before on Match...

My Name is Macster and I Approve This Message